Small essays.

[Бирюза]

Feelings.
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We lived on a different planet.
Or, in another dimension, this is not important.

The main thing was that we were the shadows. No ordinary flat shadows from the sun or other light source on a wall or pavement, and the shadows that have volume, weight, smell. Shadows that seemed to repeat the motion those out there, in the dark, in the void live their normal lives. And we knew that. And we felt nothing. We never and no one was sorry we had and did not like, do not suffer, nothing good. And we know what we do not know those whose shadows we were, knew most importantly - know when to die. Neither the hour, every day - but the year know exactly. And in the shadows of life, everyone knew it - both about themselves and about others. And no one really thought about it, do not worry - it was necessary, so it should be.

- You muesli or apricot and black currant? - Calmly asked my mother at eleven son sitting in a wheelchair, knowing that he would soon die.
-Anyway - he said while talking to someone on CellPhones ...

Lieutenant Colonel in the gray overcoat officer pushed through the door airport cafe, put down his hat, placed next to the table a black bag with a bright yellow stripe that does not harmonize with the uniforms, and, stroking her hair and went to the bar to order your last life coffee.
That's all.
All.

The child disappeared into space, the wheelchair fell sidushku handset ...
Colonel disappeared unnoticed and only a smoking cigarette in the ashtray, which lies next to the ashtray cap yes bag at the table, reminded that just here was someone ...

-Take the phone - said working life to maintain order, holding his mother's before you drove off the carriage.
- And, thank you, I almost forgot - she replied, put the phone in her purse and went on her way.

- Call the worker to clean a table - the bartender asked visitors and waiting for the worker will take the ashtray, hat and bag, sat down to breakfast.

And there, in that other world were pain and tears and love. Posledeee sorry, the last goodbye, as sung to some old songs.

Grief with the ringing torn nerves, shortening the already short life.
But each of the world of shadows from birth passionately dreamed at least for a moment to get to the other one, the upper world to experience this miracle, which was called the senses to experience both the pain of loss is broken heart, and giddy with joy, as from feelings for the other, close to you a person can experience physical pain and how of happiness can capture the spirit.
But we lived on another planet.