Funny pictures, satire and humor

[Кирилл Сызранский]

sweaty and dirty is the Mayor of London fun ...
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Even in my country house has a shower.
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[Вивьен]

Plakatik ...

[tivat]

Delivery of LCD monitors and Telecom.
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[Santa]

Website for the collection of bureaucratic nonsense earned

On Friday night earned rossiyabezdurakov.rf site, where you can complain about the bureaucratic nonsense. The site is still operating in test mode, but soon the visitors will be able to vote for the most harmful nonsense.

Messages are divided into several sections: "Laws and Documents", "Transport and Roads", "Housing and the Environment", "Quotes officials" and "Miscellaneous." Russia on the map, you can see from the site come stories about stupid things. So, at 23:00 January 20 in Moscow received 41 message.

The most popular absurd quotes at the moment are the statements of the head of the CEC of Russia Vladimir Churov ("I look at life optimistically - when asked how to live, we must answer: choose a cemetery"), the head of the Health Ministry Tatiana Golikova ("We must improve the detection of diseases and to learn their treat, not leading to death ") and State Duma deputy Nikolay Kharitonov (" We are not a person - we are clearly spelled out - MPs ").

Top 10 stupid things will be the subject of "big government", which is said on the site, will achieve their elimination. "Our task - to collect bureaucratic nonsense in order to then remove them from our lives" - told RIA Novosti the project manager Raf Shakirov.

Shakirov also warned that not all messages will be posted on the site, each will be moderated. First, attention will be given the facts that affect the lives of large numbers of people.

The intention to launch a site where citizens can write "about the most pointless, stifling bureaucracy lives," Russian President Dmitry Medvedev announced in a message to the Federal Assembly at the end of December 2011. "Based on your suggestions will make decisions about their cancellation or adjustment of some procedures, well, if necessary - staffing solutions" - promised the Russians to the president.

Note that from September 2010 there is a project known blogger Dmitry Tarnovo and online media "Ridus" titled "A country without silly", which also collects cases of violations of human rights and the laws of the Russian Federation. According Ternovskii in his "live journal" in November 2011, he personally told the president about the project. At that meeting, according to blogger attended billionaire Mikhail Abyzov, who was recently appointed adviser to Medvedev to coordinate the work of "big government."

http://lenta.ru/news/2012/01/20/withoutfools/

[kozhinart]

EXCERPTS FROM THE WORKS OF PUPILS

 1. Tractor raced across the field, slightly popahivaya ...
 2. In the summer we went with youngsters in an overnight trip, and took with him only
 needed: a potato, a tent and Maria Ivanovna.
 3. Lermontov died in the Caucasus, but he liked it not so!
 4. Plyushkin piled in a corner in a heap and planted there every day.
 5. Lena went to the duel in his trousers. They parted, and a shot rang out.
 6. Dantes was not worth a damn Pushkin.
 7. In the court entered two horses. These were the sons of Taras Bulba.
 8. Onegin liked Byron, so he hung it over the bed.
 9. Gerasim put a saucer on the floor, and began to poke at him a muzzle.
 10. Onegin was hard inside, and he came to relieve Tatiana.

Читать дальше... 

11. Lermontov was born in the village with his grandmother when his parents lived in St. Petersburg.
 12. Chatsky out through the anus and podpernul door with a stick.
 13. Gerasim Mume poured soup.
 14. Poor Lisa tore the flowers and it fed his mother.
 15. Khlestakov sat in the cart and shouted: "Drive on, my dear, to the airport!"
 16. His father died in childhood Chatsky.
 17. Pierre was a man of so pissed spirits.
 18. Under his old age chained to a bed with cancer.
 19. Suddenly he heard the creaking of springs Herman. It was the old princess.
 20. Kabaniha groped Katerina soft spot every day and was pressing on him.
 21. In Rostov had three daughters: Hatasha, Sonya, and Nikolay.
 22. Taras sat on the horse. The horse bent down, and then laughed.
 23. Tatiana soul full of love and can not wait, as would douse it with someone.
 24. It was the French regiment and Kutuzov.
 25. Onegin was a rich man: in the morning he sat in the dressing room and then went to the circus.
 26. Peter jumped off the pedestal and ran for the Eugene, loud tsokaya hooves.
 27. Gogol's nose is full of profound meaning.
 28. Deaf and dumb Gerasim did not like gossip and spoke only the truth.
 29. Turgenev's Fathers do not satisfy any or children.
 30. These girls like Olga, has long been fed up with Onegin, Pushkin, and so, too.
 31. With Mikhail Lermontov I met in kindergarten.
 32. Gerasim ate enough for four, and worked alone.
 33. Pechorin stole Bela in a rush of feelings and love her like a
 closer to the people. Ho did not succeed. Not that he was with
 Maxim Maksimych.
 34. Chichikov many positive features: it is always clean-shaven and smells.
 35. Pugachev Grinev helped not only to work, but his love for Masha.
 36. The silky, blond curls were beaten out from under her lace apron.
 37. Sons came to Taras and became acquainted with him.
 38. Famusov condemns his daughter for what Sophia in the morning and already a man.
 39. Thus, Pechorin mastered Beloy and Kazbich - Karakezom.
 40. Natasha was a true Russian nature, very fond of nature and often went into the yard.
 42. Grushnitski was aiming carefully at the forehead, the bullet grazed his knee.
 43. The poets of the XIX century were thin-skinned people: they are often killed in duels.
 44. Here he first learned the Russian language spoken by nanny Arina.
 45. The first successes of Pierre Bezukhov in love was bad - he just got married.
 46. As a result of increased Tikhon no man, but a real sheep.
 47. Kirsanov was sitting in the bushes, but that they should not have seen.
 48. First, Tatyana Eugene Onegin dearly loved, and he her eyes could not see. Ho when it froze, Eugene decided to start all over again. It was too late.
 49. The President took the milkmaids so for a living, that milk production increased immediately.
 50. When I read the novel Gorky "Mother," that he wanted to become a mother.
 51. Ha field were heard groans of the wounded and the dead.
 52. Fly on crutches is not easy, but he has learned.

[Santa]

Sculptor sued the museum, he never returned from the exhibition potatoes

The Supreme Court of Munich (Bavaria), consider the claim of the sculptor, requiring him to return the potatoes, passed them to the local museum for 22 years for the exposure, according to the magazine Focus.

It clarifies the issue, in 1990, the plaintiff offered the Munich museum to create a golden statue of a cross of French fries. The prototype of a similar sculpture was the installation of the present chips. In this case the original was exhibited in the museum along with a sculpture made of gold. Visitors are offered to purchase the exhibit (including a gold statue, and the original potato) for 4,6 thousand euros.

Nevertheless, visitors are not interested in an exhibit. In this regard, the author asked him to return, and after a lengthy dispute with the museum received the sculpture back. However, the original, he had not returned, explaining that he had long been lost.

Then the sculptor gave to the museum in court, requiring him to reimburse the damage. He claims that the installation of the potato itself is a work of art. It clarifies the issue, the plaintiff appreciated the two 22-year-old piece of potato in 2000 euros.

The Regional Court of Munich rejected the claim, finding unpersuasive the arguments set forth by the sculptor as a justification for the artistic value of the potato installation. The plaintiff appealed this decision to a higher court. Terms of the lawsuit in the Supreme Court in the land have not been finalized.

http://www.ria.ru/culture/20120123/546821877.html

[Victor_art]

let's ride!
>

[Santa]

The Moscow authorities have predicted the collapse of transport in 2012

Moscow authorities have acknowledged that the reconstruction of the main thoroughfares of the capital vyletnyh, which will start in 2012, significantly degrade the transport situation in the city at the time of the work. About this newspaper "Kommersant" said a source from the city administration.

To date, preliminary work has already begun on the Warsaw and Kashira highway. In addition, the City Council in the near future will be determined with the contractors for the reconstruction of Yaroslavsky highway and Mozhaisky road enthusiasts, and Leningrad, Volgograd and Ryazan prospectus. ** Construction work here will last about two years.

During the reconstruction of highways offered drivers to use detour routes. Typically, this is adjacent to highways streets, which are already overloaded, experts say. According to a leading specialist of the development group of companies "Echelon Geolayf", which studies traffic in Moscow, Mikhail Kashtanova, construction work will slow traffic on the repaired areas by 20-30 percent. At the same time on adjacent streets, extended jams can occur at an average flow rate of ten miles per hour.

As previously reported, before the end of the year Moscow will approve reconstruction projects vyletnyh 19 lines, which should ultimately improve the transport situation in the capital. Work involves the construction of new interchanges and overpasses, the expansion of the roadway, the lateral organization of congresses and reducing the number of traffic lights.

http://lenta.ru/news/2012/01/18/kollaps/
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** Ie the most basic routes will be blocked!
Good for the authorities in Moscow!
Gentlemen, comrades from Moscow! Mass buy motorcycles, scooters, cross country skiing, sleigh, sled, roller skates >
Who that can ..
Very funny >

[tivat]

Сообщение от Santa

Gentlemen, comrades from Moscow!
Mass buy motorcycles, scooters, cross country skiing, sleigh, sled, roller skates >

Who that can ..

Very funny >

Santa, the summer is great as the Mayor of London ...
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[Eriksson]

Сообщение от tivat

Santa to fly high, as the Mayor of London ...

What's funny in a bike?
Half of Scandinavia, if not more, prefer bikes road transport.
And for the health and environment - one big advantage!